Coping with Postnatal Depression : 5 Things That Helped My Recovery
I have struggled with periods of depression since I was at university, each one debilitating and life-altering, but none of them compare to my experience of postnatal depression. My first birth was difficult and traumatic, but for most of the first year I had a wonderful period of positive mental health. It was when I returned to work when Clem was around 10 months old, that the symptoms came in full force. It was one of the darkest periods of life for me.
Yet I’m still here, and my mental health is better than ever, and surprisingly the things that helped the most are some of the simple self-care principles that everyone needs - sleep, a good diet, and most of all, loving family and friends. Today I want to share these simple tips to help other mamas out there.
If you are struggling with postnatal depression, I hope these encouragements help, but I would also like you to hear that the most important thing is to reach out for help. Depression is very common and normal, and not something to be ashamed of. Seek help from a loved one, your GP or a helpline like Samaritans or PaNDAs.
What is postnatal depression?
Having a baby is one of the most joyous moments of any parent’s life. You’ve created a new life that is yours to look after and raise into adulthood. Your love for your child is like nothing you’ve ever experienced, and the emotions associated are overwhelming, both positive and negative.
For such a positive experience, it’s surprising then, that so many new mothers experience severe depression after giving birth. It affects more than 10% of mothers and it can turn lives upside down. Most mothers experience a short period of sadness and worry in the days after giving birth, often referred to as the baby blues, but this is usually short-lived. But if your symptoms last longer, or appear when your baby is a little older, you could have postnatal depression.
This condition is usually characterised by a persistent low mood, lack of energy, and inability to feel enjoyment. You may also experience trouble sleeping (aside from the usual sleep deprivation with a baby) and difficulty bonding with your child. Depression is different for everyone, meaning that not only will the symptoms differ, but there is also no universal treatment option. Different methods work for different people.
If you are suffering, or worried about suffering, from postnatal depression, here are five things that I and countless others have found helpful for recovery.
Seek help
As I mentioned earlier, this is the most important thing you can do to cope with postnatal depression. The first step can be as simple as asking your partner, parent or friend for help. There are also many organisations specialising in postnatal depression, or you can speak to your GP or health visitor to seek talking therapy like cognitive behavioural therapy.
Stay active
Exercise is one of the most effective ways to alleviate the symptoms of depression and other mood disorders. Exercise might feel like the last thing on your mind, but even the simplest activity can make a huge difference to your mood. When I was in the midst of depression, with the help of a therapist I set myself small goals to walk around the block, do five minutes of yoga, or ten minutes of light stretching. Just a short period of light exercise a day is all it takes to improve your mood, boost your self-esteem and reduce feelings of stress and anxiety.
It can be difficult to find the time with a baby in tow, but even a gentle walk with your little one will make a difference. Home workouts are also excellent - I tried to do 15 minute yoga sessions while the little one was sleeping.
Get good sleep
It can be hard to drop off with a newborn, but insufficient sleep is one of the biggest contributing factors to postnatal depression. If you can, try to sleep when your little one sleeps (though I know this isn’t always possible!) or ask a friend or family member to look after the little one while you take a nap. You can also share night feeds with a partner, so that you’re not bearing the weight of all the lack of sleep. Try not to feel guilty about taking time for you - a rested mummy is a better mummy!
Create time for yourself
I’ll say it again - a rested mummy is a better mummy! Taking time for yourself gives you a chance to decompress and wind down from the stresses of motherhood. Enlist some help from your partner, family, or friends to look after your child for a while while you go for a walk, have a long bath, or meditate. I found this hugely difficult when I was struggling - I felt inadequate and guilty - but it is so important to look after yourself. Being stressed and overwhelmed will leave you without the energy to love your little one well, so rest for you is also good for your little one!
Consider medication
There can be stigma surrounding the use of medication for mental health, but my personal experience has been really positive. Medication provides the mental breathing space to be able to work through your negative thoughts and to take small steps towards recovery. If antidepressants seem too scary to begin with, you can start with natural supplements such as CBD (like the CBD gummies UK here) can. There is growing evidence that CBD can be a great help with anxiety and depression. Speak to your GP about the options, and go with what you feel is best for you.
This is a collaborative post.
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